When I wake I’m alone.
I glance at the clock and see it’s nearly 4am…Getting up I stare through the window at the stars and think about my encounter with Elsa.
My stomach sinks when I think of what I’ve done, I’m in love with Maya, so why did I sleep with Elsa? Maya can never find out about this.
Wide awake I leave my bedroom and head downstairs to my lap top. I suddenly feel quite inspired.
I’m unaware of time, but a shrill tone snaps me back to reality and I realise I’ve been writing for over 5 hours… I stare around me wondering where the noise is coming from when I realise that it’s the telephone.
“Hello?” I say uncertainly upon answering.
“Yves… I’m so sorry!” she sounds close to tears.
“What? What’s wrong…?”
“I’ve been so horrible to you- so unsupportive, I miss you so much…”
I say nothing.
“I hope you don’t mind me ringing you… I just thought about what I said to you and realised how selfish I was being, I haven’t told you anything about what’s been going on…”
“Of course I don’t mind…”
“I can’t get by without you… I miss you so much, the case at work, it’s over – I need you.”
I knew the case in which Maya has been involved was draining her, but Maya had always refused to tell me anything about it, preferring to confide in her partner – Reuben Lake instead.
“I’ve only been gone a few weeks…” I say.
“I know… I… It’s knowing you’re not just around the corner- god that sounds selfish- I mean, you’re not even in the country and it frightens me; if this is what it would be like for us to break up then I don’t want to. I love you, and of course I’ll marry you…”
I frown; I already sold the ring to help pay for my trip… but Maya still wants me and that’s the only thing that matters.
Fleetingly, I feel doubt in my gut – the events from the previous evening leave a sour taste in my mouth, sure, the sex was fantastic and different to anything I’ve ever felt with Maya- but I regret every moment.
In the weeks that follow I think of Elsa and occasionally wonder how she’s getting on… it’s been 5 weeks since our encounter in Sunlit Tides and I’m aware she must have moved away by now, I doubt I’ll ever see her again.
Maya and I spend the majority of our time together looking up wedding venues… there’s so much to do and Maya is extremely excited, she’s loving trying on dresses and arranging everything… I, on the other hand, am exhausted.
We’re also moving into our own place… we made an agreement that we need to find a new residence by ourselves… I think I’ve been reliant on my father for too long, and it’s time I flew the coup.
It’s all happening remarkably quickly… I’m not writing as much as anymore – after careful consideration I’ve decided to get a more secure job and I write in my spare time. It’s difficult because I’m often tired, but I know that it’s for best… I have little time for meditation… what with all the wedding plans and saving for a house… everything has been extremely hectic and my experiences in Sunlit Tides seems like centuries ago.
“That’s the last box unpacked,” Maya beams at me and I stare around the quaint cottage, at all of our shared possessions. It’s finally beginning to feel like home.
“I say we celebrate,” I wink at my fiancé and she cocks an eyebrow at me.
“Wait, I have something for you,” Maya smiles at me and she delves into her gym bag.
“Close your eyes and hold your hands out,” she says, beaming up at me.
I do as I’m bid.
When I open my eyes I see she’s presented me with a Mac Book.
“Sorry it’s not wrapped,” she says uncertainly, searching my face for a reaction.
“Wow, Maya!” I smile at her, “This is amazing!”
“You really think so? I mean… your laptop is so old… I figured you needed a new one… and I thought if you were writing on something you liked you might feel more inspired…”
“Are you kidding, this is the best present ever!” I scoop her up and spin her around, kissing her all the while.
“I have something for you,” I say, as we break apart.
I present her with a bottle of wine and some chocolates, “What do you say? I think we need to celebrate…” I open the box and hold out a coffee cream under her nose.
Maya pulls away… “Ugh, it smells horrific!” she cries, “How will I get into my wedding dres-“ she stops and stares at me, eyes wide.
“Oh my god,” she holds her gut, “I’m gonna puke!” and with that she darts out of the room.
“What the hell do you think-“ she vomits again and I realise it was a bit of a stupid question.
A few moments later she appears, her make-up smudged down her flushed cheeks.
“Better,” I touch her shoulder.
“Ugh… I feel ghastly…” she slumps forward into me, holding onto me.
“I wonder what it is… have you eaten something dodgy?”
Maya shrugs and leans on me as I guide her through to the sitting room.
We sit beside one another and she suddenly turns to me.
“Oh my god… Yves…”
Maya rolls her eyes, “It’s just called morning sickness, it doesn’t have to occur in the morning…”
My stomach turns, pregnant… with my child… Jeez.
“I thought you were on the pill?”
“I was… I stopped taking it when I knew I wanted a break… I sort of thought I wouldn’t need to…”
“Don’t shout at me!”
“I’m not shouting!” I yell, then I realise I am shouting.
“I’m sorry,” I lower my voice, “but this is all happening way, way too fast! I’m 20 years old, and in the space of 5 weeks I’ve gone from living with you, to being engaged to you and now there’s a strong possibility I’m going to be a father?”
“It’s happening quickly for me too…” Maya mutters, starring at her lap.
Maya stands, “No, I’ll go to the store, I don’t want you there…”
“You’re being immature, Yves! This is a big deal for me too! You never think about my feelings!”
“Maya, I’m sorry… I’m just scared…” I attempt to grab her arm but she shrugs me off and walks away.
“I’ll see you later, Yves…”